Bringing you the craziest stories: 1 at a time.

Holy Hell!

Ok. Now there’s two things about this article that will stand out to you if you pay attention. But, seeing as most of you live in a “twitter” world where everything is in 140 letter tidbits, I’ll break it down for you.

1.) 19 pound baby to an indian woman?! HOLY JEEZ!
2.) The notion that if you’re pregnant, you can have sex with no protection because “I can’t get pregnant” has just been blown to pieces.

Thanks a lot lady. You’ve just ruined men’s lives forever.

Another week.

So this week I’m looking at implementing a couple things to keep me actively posting things that are entertaining to read. Gimmicks if you will. For example. My friend Lindsey (Lindsey’s Rantings) has a Monday 13 that she posts.

Now, I have my “5 O’Clock Rant” (permanent name still out for decision) which I plan on instating for kicks, but what about something weekly? Or even bi-weekly?

Any thoughts, ideas, comments, “we really don’t care”‘s?

I Feel So Used…

I’m so tired of being used by women. I’m not talking about women who only seem to want me for my body (although that’s happened…once). I’m talking about women who use me for my MIND.
Truth be told, I’m a kind, understanding, patient man who is willing to actually willing to listen to women and hear them and their problems. They come to me hoping to feel better by talking to me, and that’s what I do—I make them feel better.
They tell me their problems, they describe what’s going on, they ask for advice, and I give them

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End of the Day Rant

Facebook.

I love it. I’m on it all day long, but there’s one tiny little thing I wish they’d add. We’re all familiar with the “Like” button under everything and it’s mother.

What about a “Don’t Like” button, or something of similar context? I mean, seriously. I don’t want to “Like” everything.

What do you think?

Silly bitches

So, I work on phones all day long, calling people who already have trading accounts. Some people still treat me like I’m a telemarketer, but yesterday I encountered one of the funniest ways to avoid talking to me.

Me: (Dials number)

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

“Hi, this is John. I’m not available at the moment, so please leave your name, number, and a message after the beep.”

Then he made a “beep” noise with his mouth, and hung up.

Lol.

Veeeerrrry, clever.

Craigslist: Rants/Raves

Ok, so this made me laugh hysterically. I found this on the Salt Lake City Craigslist Rants and Raves.

I want to do this…LOL.

Scene:

A snotty little girl is tugging at her mother’s hand–they are standing near me next to the dairy section at Walmart. The girl is obviously a little brat, and the mother is too tired to deal with her antics.

Little girl: “You’re not my mommy! You’re not my mommy!”
Mom: “Stop it.”
Little girl: “You’re not my mommy!”
Mom: “Cut it out.”
Little girl: “You’re not my mommy! You’re not my mommy!”
Mom: *facepalm*

Me: “Well do you want to come with me instead, little

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End of the workday tidbit

Something new I’m going to attempt to do. Essentially before I leave work every day, or before 5 P.M. (MST) I’ll post a link, video, clip, or even just random quote from a person, or just me to end your day.

Sound fun?

Inaugural tidbit:

Flavored Tobacco Ban

Obama bans flavored cigarettes, cigars, wraps, shisha, etc.

How does this make you feel???

The Prince and the Pauper

Hello again my faithful friends.

I popped open my Google Analytics today, and saw that within the past three days, I’ve gone from 9 views, to 30 views per day! So that’s gotta be saying something. Now, if we can just get people to start interacting on the blog when they read it, I’ll be happy.

Man I’m all over the place today. I keep having ideas and typing them out, only to go back over them and find out that I basically put four thoughts into one blurb. Awesome.

So, today’s topics come from a couple friends.

Number one, and probably the funniest:

“Rich

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Shenanigans

First: Go to the link below and watch the video.

VIDEO: Forget drugs, Wii is the new addiction of America!

Ok, so now that we’ve all done that…

WTF?! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I’m not an avid news watcher, but this happened to be in the background while I was eating dinner last night, and I laughed out loud. Literally. LOL’d. So, naturally I decided to share it with all (3) of you.

My initial thought when I saw this was “Seriously? What a bunch of dumb cops!”

Then my brain switched into “idea” mode. I mean, I don’t use drugs, but if I did, I’d take

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The all-day long (work day) blog post

So I figured that in order to make my day a little bit more interesting, I’d start a blog now (9:00 a.m.) and finish it by the end of my day at work (5:00).  I suppose to make this more of a full day I should have started by 8, but, I didn’t. So there’s really not much I can do about it.

Last night I dove head first into a quest for new music. I do that from time to time. Essentially I get bored with my current 60 GB of music, and search for new artists. So far, I

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Top Albums of the Moment (In no particular order):

Emery: "...In Shallow Seas We Sail"
The Roots: "How I Got Over"
After Midnight Project: "Let's Build Something to Break"
Eminem: "The Recovery"
Vampire Weekend: "Contra"
Asking Alexandria: "Stand Up and Scream"
Janelle Monae: "The ArchAndroid"
Glee: "Volumes 1 2 & 3"
The Dead Weather: "Sea of Cowards"
The Classic Crime: "The Silver Chord"
Sara Bareilles: "Little Voice"

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